My Colt 45 Moments

A series of TV Commercials currently running in the airwaves sure gained my attention. The Ad shows 4 men drinking their favorite beer (Colt 45 I suppose, hehe). If any of the men behaves or acts “unmanly” or against the stereotype Machismo, he gets splattered by a giant bottle of Colt 45. I’m no Jock, just an average Joe like the most of us, but here are my own contributions to those men who must be splattered….by the giant bottle.

Men who put lemon slices in their beers – they might as well order a nice cold, sweet lemonade. Include those men that order alcopops.

Men who make the “gumuguhit” expression while drinking San Mig Light – C’mon now, with San Mig Light? I can’t fault them if it's already their habbit, even when drinking plain water.

The guy that invites his pals for a night of drinking, but after only a bottle of beer, suddenly tells his buddies that he has to leave because of an urgent text from "someone". Be sure to buy them 6 rounds of beer and a pulutan before you leave, lest you want a big whomp on your face.

Men should limit, if not refrain from saying “Promise!” (with the right hand raised), "HELLO" after stressing a point, "As in" and “Thank you Thank you!”. Makes me want to order yakisoba and tempura. One thank you is enough.

If your speaking to another guy on the phone, don’t say “Bye-bye” to end the conversation. Sounds like you're saying Good Bye to your mother. “Sige” will do, better yet, just hang up. Guys will understand.

Men should never be too much of a sleek dresser. People will know you spend a great deal of your time reading fashion magazines. Wearing your clothes with a degree of sloppiness is permissible.

This I really hate. Shirts with collars raised. I can understand if you're trying to shade your nape from the harmful effects of UV. Please don't pretend to be an Eastern European Count from the Middle Ages.

Men who hum, lipsync, or sing while a love song or power ballad is being played in the presence of others. Worse is if they know the whole lyrics to the song. Though singing in the showers may be allowed.

Men who bob their heads to any Justin Timberlake song.

In a Bar, those who force themselves to sing in the "Audience Participation" segment of the performing band just to impress their dates or be a show off to their inebriated pals. Please, save us the agony, unless you're an "IDOL" caliber. I for one don't want to be paying for that expensive beer just to hear them sing. In other countries, they are pelted with bottles to try that kind of stunt.

Those who get into syncronized dancing.

Men who customize their Facebook and Friendster pages. Just use the default settings.

Men should only comb their hair not more that 3 times a day; before going to work, during lunch break, and before going home. If one can’t resist the urge to fix his hair constantly, at least don’t keep the comb in your pant’s back pocket, where it will be visible to others. We are not in the 1950’s.

Men should never be caught watching a Judy Ann Santos or Kris Aquino Movie, unless forced by their girlfriends or wives. Men should also learn the art of sleeping with their eyes open. Lest they want to get the cold shoulder.

No stuffed toys (Garfield, Hello Kitty, Songebob, and the likes) should be seen in men’s cars. Bobble heads of your favorite NBA Player or WWE Wrestler are preferred

Men who allow another person to cut his finger and toe nails. Worse is when a shade of pink is still visible in that man’s nails.

No matter how oily a man’s face gets, he should never put powder on his face. You will end up looking like an espasol.

Men who become very vocal about their choices on who should sing the national anthem at Manny Pacquiao's bouts.

Beers of the World

There is a bar in Makati that serves 100 beers from all over the world. Needless to say that I am a beer lover, it got me thinking to try out every brand of beer that my tastebuds can find. My Rheumatologist will not be so amused though.

Kirin Beer, Japan's No. 1 Beer, was also a major investor of SMC. I found the quaint bitter taste quite delectable. Quite pricey though, costs P125 per 330ml bottle at supermarket prices.

Beck's Pale Lager of Germany. One of the better beers I've tasted. Smooth and goes down easy. Just hope it also comes in a 500ml bottle.

San Miguel Pale Pilsen - Of course, nothing beats our very own. Availabe in almost all bars, restaurants, supermarkets, and sari-sari stores. I like it ice-cold, rather than served in a glass with ice, which dilutes that taste of my Pale. When I'm in the mood for a night of boozing, I have to drink at least 4 of these babies, lest I want to suffer a slight headache. Though i doubt if can stop at 4, hehe. I enjoy Pale with my favorite Isaw and Tokwat Baboy, but I guess it goes well with any kind of pulutan.

San Mig Light. Not a big fan. I call this one my "NO CHOICE BEER". I only drink this one if the establishment doesn't serve San Miguel Pale Pilsen or if the host only offers SMLight. Can't seem to find the flavor and beer taste in it. If I want to get hammered, I want to taste the full beer flavor of all the bottles I downed; and not with a lame tasting beer. Good enough, though for a 3 bottle buzz.

Cerveza Negra, San Miguel's Caramel Flavored Dark Beer. I truely believe this beer is made only for the ladies. No man should be caught drinking this beer. Men who do drink Cerverza Negra are in the same league as those who put lemon slices in their beers . Felt quite emasculated when I downed a bottle.

Guinness of Ireland. Being a Celtic fan, just got to try this one. Malted Barley is roasted to give it its distinct flavor and dark ruby red color. The initial taste actually gave me an after-taste of soysauce, but got used to it after a few gulps.

EKU beer of Germany. Bought this one from Rustan's Supermarket. Tasted like San Miguel Super Dry.

Carlsberg of Denmark. I feel a little nostalgia everytime Carlsberg comes up. Still in College, bars will offer Carlsberg Draft, which was cheaper than San Miguel Draft. Though we saved money from Carlsberg, we had to bear the not so pleasant after taste. Well, as long as got hammered, that was good enough. The nastiest thing about it was my toilet explosions the morning after. Pizza Hut even served this beer for a while.

Corona Beer of Mexic0. Though I know not a few people raving about this beer, I can't seem to understand why. There is a "pakla" taste to it.

Edelweiss, brewed in the Austrian side of the Alps. You might remember the name from a song from "The Sound of Music". This gets my vote for THE BEST BEER I EVER HAD. The Brewery uses water pouring down the Alps. The fruity flavor blends perfectly with the full wheat beer taste. I can even drink Edelweiss without ordering Pulutan, hehe. I can't wait for the day that bars and supermarkets carry this Brand.

Heineken from The Netherlands. This is common in the shelves of your local supermarkets. The green bottle is the only thing that distinguishes itself from the other beers.

Warsteiner Beer - Warstein is an actual town in Germany. I tried this one in a cozy cafe along Katipunan Ave.

Blue Girl Beer - first brewed in Bremen, Germany. Readily available in Hong Kong and Taiwan. A little too bland for my taste, ala San Mig Light.

Erdinger, wheat beer from Bavaria. It has 8 different varieties. I believe you can find it in Robinson's Supermarket.

Kapuziner Beer from Germany. I bought this one also at Robinson's Supermarket. It's 5.4% alcohol in 500 ml can.

Tsingtao Beer (Ching-dow) - Brewed in the Quingdao province of China. First tasted it while in Hong Kong. I always try to order one in bars if they have it. Can't seem to find the bitter taste, though one can distinguish the lychee taste. Good for just chilling out, cause i don't expect to be hammered by this beer.